Emmett: Is this thing on? Uhh, I'd like to propose a toast to my new sister. Bella, I hope you've got enough sleep these past 18 years 'cause you won't be getting anymore for a while!
Jessica: Well, Bella was just like everybody else. Totally mesmerized by Edward. Or "The Hair," as I like call him. Umm, & then suddenly, Edward is all about Bella! Even though she's not the captain of the volleyball team. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding... Or the president of the student council.
Charlie: Edward will be a good husband. I know this because I'm a cop. And I know things. Like, how to hunt somebody to the ends of the earth.
Alice: Now that your my sister, you'll have to get over your sense of fashion.
Charlie: And I know how to use a gun.
Alice: Skirts, heels, handbags.
Renee: Go to sleep, my love. Go to sleep. When you wake, you'll see me.
Esme: I'd like to thank Renee & Charlie for bringing such a wonderful person into the world & into our lives. We will cherish & protect her forever.
Edward: It's an extraordinary thing to meet someone who you can bear your soul to & will accept you for what you are. I've been waiting what seems like a very long time to get beyond what I am. But with Bella, I feel like I can finally begin. So I'd like to propose a toast to my beautiful bride. No measure of time with you will be long enough, but let's start with forever.